Bimbly is a Halfling Wizard with an uncanny talent to hate everything. Poozik is a Dwarven Berserker with an insatiable appetite and an awful memory. They occasionally team up and… perform menial tasks like counting houses and fixing water pumps.
No, wait! There is action in this story too. Infinite Paradox Corporation invade the land and attempt to assume control. There are also pirates, wizards, interns and dragons. There is a Dragon! That automatically makes this book awesome.
Fine! I’ll try another approach.
As darkness looms over the world, an evil Death Lord asserts himself upon the pinnacle of the Black Tower. His shadow stretched across the land and consumes the souls of the unsuspecting and the innocent. Only two reluctant heroes stand between darkness and the light. Two heroes of heroism and justice hold the line and…
No. Sorry, I can’t do this. The first description was way more on point. I promise it’s a lot more entertaining than it sounds. Buy the book, judge for yourself.
Poozik is a delicate, sensitive flower of a Dwarf. Born to a loving family, he is a profoundly confusing mixed bag of pretty much everything. He is lazy, yet adventurous. He is an outgoing introvert. Poozik hates to go outside, yet, once there, he doesn’t want to go back inside. One thing he is certain of though, is the fact that he hates pants, very, very much.
This adorable Dwarf always wanted to be a Wizard. Yes, to fling fireballs was his lifelong dream. Unfortunately, this cuddly little creature is also cursed with Selective Amnesia. What does that mean? That means he forgets things. Somewhere along the course of his life, he forgot that he wanted to be a Wizard and, instead, became a Berserker. Once in a while, fleeting memories of Wizardhood return to him, but alas, it is too late. His class has been chosen and Berserkers who are cursed with Selective Amnesia cannot dual class into Wizards, or Wizard Beserkers, or Berserking Wizards, or Berzards, or whatever you would like to call that awful mess of a class.
Poozik’s passion is food. Poozik does not like to be angry, but unfortunately since that comes hand in hand with his class, he must get angry once in a while. After, before and sometimes during the times he gets angry, he gets hungry. Being that his passion is food, eating helps Poozik relax. In this Dwarf’s mind, there is never a better time to relax than the present or the near future, or both. Once the relaxation process has begun, it cannot be interrupted without the risk of triggering another Berserker Rage spell.